Jiah Khan’s Last Letter: Says she aborted baby, and was tortured

If you are reading this I might have already left or about to leave. I am broken inside. You might not know this but you have affected me deeply to a point where I have lost myself loving you. Yet you tortured me every day.

These days I see no light. I wake up not wanting to wake up. There was a time I saw my life with you, a future with you. But you shatter my dreams. I feel dead inside. I have never given so much of myself to someone or cared so much. You returned my love with cheating and lies. It didn’t matter how many gifts I gave you. Or how I beautiful I looked for you. I was scared of getting pregnant but I gave you myself completely.

The pain you have caused me everyday has destroyed every bit of me, destroyed my soul. I can’t eat or sleep or think or function. I am running away from everything. The career is not even worth it anymore. When I first met you I was driven, ambitious and disciplined. How I felt for you, a love I thought would bring out the best in me. I don’t know why destiny brought us together.

After all the pain, the rape, the abuse, the torture I have seen previously, I didn’t deserve this. I didn’t see any love or commitment from you. I just became increasingly scared that you would hurt me mentally or physically. Your life was about partying and women. Mine was you and my work. If I stay here, I will crave you and miss you. So I’m kissing my 10-year career and dreams goodbye! I never told you but I received a message about you.

About you cheating on me. You embarrassed me. I never want out, I never want with anyone else. I am a loyal person. I never met anyone with Kartik. I just wanted you to feel how you make me feel constantly. No other woman will ever give you as much as I did or love you as much as I did. I can write that in my blood.

Things were looking up for me here but is it worth it when you constantly feel the pain of heartbreak when the person you love wants to abuse you or threaten to hit you or cheats on you telling other girls they are beautiful or throws you out of their house when you have nowhere to go and you have come to them out of love or when they lie to your face or they make you chase after them in their cars or disrespects their family. You never even met my sister. I bought your sister presents. You tore my soul. All I wanted was love.

I did everything for you. I was working for you but you were never my partner. My future is destroyed my happiness snatched away from me. I always wished the best for you, was ready to invest whatever little money I had in your betterment. You never appreciated my love, kicked me in the face. I have no confidence, self-esteem left whatever talent whatever ambition. You took it all away, you destroyed my life. You hurt me so much that I waited for you for ten days and you didn’t bother buying me something.

The Goa trip was my birthday present but even after you cheated on me, I still spent on you. I aborted our baby when it hurt me deeply. You destroyed my Christmas and my birthday dinner when I came back. When I tried my hardest to make your birthday special, you chose to be away from me on Valentine’s Day. You promised once we make it to one year we would get engaged.

All you want in life is your partying, your women and your selfish motives. All I wanted was you and my happiness. You took both away from me. I spent money on you selflessly. You would laugh in my face when I would cry for you. I have nothing left in this world to live for after this. I wish you had loved me like I loved you. I had dreamt of our future. I dreamt of our success. I leave this place with nothing but broken dreams and empty promises. All I want now is go to sleep and never wake up again. I am nothing. I had everything. I felt so alone even when I was with you. You made me feel alone and vulnerable. I am so much more than this.”

Below are a few pictures from Jiah Khan’s prayer meet on Sunday.

Deepika Padukone at Jiah Khan's prayer meetDeepika Padukone at Jiah Khan’s prayer meet

Deepika Padukone New Photo

Nagma at Jiah Khan's prayer meetNagma at Jiah Khan’s prayer meet

Aamir KhanAamir Khan

Aamir Khan at Jiah Khan's prayer meetAamir Khan at Jiah Khan’s prayer meet

Jiah Khan's mother and sisterJiah Khan’s mother and sister

Rabiya AminRabiya Amin

Jiah Khan's prayer meetJiah Khan’s prayer meet

Aamir Khan prays with Jiah Khan's mother and sisterAamir Khan prays with Jiah Khan’s mother and sister

Jiah Khan's mother, sister family member at her prayer meetJiah Khan’s mother, sister family member at her prayer meet

Click Here for more pictures from Jiah Khan’s prayer meet

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14 Comments

  • It is easier to say not to do suicide. But, there are moments in life when everyone of us do think there is nothing left. Most of us survive that moment, while the more vulnerable, soft hearted do succumb.

    RIP Jiah.

  • This took all my concentration and reserves of inner strength to read such a private letter with such real life emotions and psychological strain. Oh My, I felt guilty for reading someone elses traumatic and tortured thoughts in what was neant to be a private letter. Its tragic to think someone could feel so alone to cope with such emotions- really my thoughts more and more go to Jiah now and hope she finds eternal happiness in the heavens above. You deserve to be happy after such an ordeal here on Earth. God bless your soul.

  • both jiah and suraj are responsible for getting pregnant and getting an abortion. it’s her fault that she killed her self.

  • I am crying…!!!! Thinks what was the feelings of Jiah Khan? I feel so sad for this pity girl.. May your soul be in peace…!!! Love you

  • I do not know why kids try to hide things from their parents especially when they are in serious trouble. The worst a parent can do is yell. I wish she had told her mom about her situation who would have helped. I guess she had post morterm depression which lead to her suicide. So sad, I really enjoyed her acting skills in House Full with Akkie.

  • God bless your soul.. Heel all your pains.. I m so said about the love u didnt get jiah..bt i dont know why u were so much mixed in love that u forgot all ur career.. Almost u did work wid superstars akki,aamir,bachchan…or may b u would b having good blockbusters wid more superstars.. Bt u went by leaving this world. God bless

  • Suicide is the biggest sin ! Why do ppl suicide, why the hell would u kill urself over love ??? Stupidest thing iv ever heard if he cheated on u why were u still with him. ?? If he tortured u y were u still with him? Seriously wat she did was pathetic…

  • She should have not committed suicide. Killing herself killed many people. She should have thought about it so much. If it was all because of Soraj, then she should have filled against him when she was alive. but :( may God bless her soul. I am not complaining. But she acted as weak. She should have a model for every girls. But she behaved like coward and went away from life.

  • Here the problem is, Jiah khan is dependant on Suraj for happiness. This is the problem most youth faces. Thinking ur lover can give u the happiness which u can’t get by yourself. In short if anyone feel that loneliness gonna disappear by falling in love, then they are going to suffer for sure. If u cant find happiness by urself then no girl/boy can make u happy. True love exist for long period of time, only if both don’t depend on each other for happiness. Yearning for dependancy is the reason for loneliness. I wish Jiah khan could have understood this before taking this extreme step to hang herself. RIP Jiah Khan, u were the most attractive actress i have ever seen on screen.

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